About Shane

My Approach

The most common complaint I hear from people who've seen other therapists is that "All they did was listen!" That's not how I work. While deep listening is something I am committed to, I see therapy as something we do together—not something I passively watch you do, and not something I do to you. I want you to feel deeply seen and heard, but also to be challenged and inspired.

Perhaps a good way of summarizing my approach is that my focus is on relationships. Not just relationships between yourself and other people, but also your relationship with your thoughts and feelings, your body image, identity, food, substances, habits, etc. 

I focus on process, on context and function, rather than merely outcomes. How did we get here? Why did this make sense, at least at one point? Given your history, your emotional landscape, your experiences, of course you are the way you are, and developed the coping strategies you did. Rather than blaming or fixing what is "wrong", therapy is about understanding how we got here and discovering new possibilities for moving forward. Put another way, I help people move from "What's wrong with me?" to "What happened to me?" and ultimately,  to "What's possible?"

I also draw heavily from mindfulness and acceptance-based cognitive behavioral tools. This involves noticing the way that the mind and body, while trying to protect us and keep us safe, create much of our suffering through the stories it tells (the mind), physiological reactivity loops (the body), and then behavioral cycles and habits. My work often features in-session experiential exercises to practice a more skillful relationship to the nervous system, whether the issue at hand is spiraling anxiety, or something more subtle like emotional withdrawal within an intimate relationship. Learning to accept and befriend the nervous system is fundamental to being able to breaking stuck cycles. It unlocks the ability to be our most courageous, creative, flexible selves, and to create new habits, relationships,  and pursue a life focused on what matters.

(If you'd like to read more about some beliefs that inform my work, go here. )

My Personal Background

While I don't ever wish to put the focus of therapy on myself, over the years, I have had clients comment on the usefulness of knowing a bit about who I am and my life experience. Here are some aspects of my identity that I freely share, and which may be helpful to know about as a client.

I am a lifelong musician and composer. Performance was a big part of my adolescence and early adulthood. I was a teacher for several years. I run nearly every day. Meditation is a daily constant. I prioritize reading. I have lived abroad, am in a bicultural, interracial marriage and am raising a mixed-race child. I have quite a bit of life experience with religion and spirituality, both Western and Eastern, both personal and academic, and both positive and negative. I am managing a lifelong chronic illness (Type 1 Diabetes).

My Education and Theoretical Background

Education and License

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (T1106), Oregon, since 2016

MS, Couples and Family Therapy, University of Oregon, 2013

BS, Psychology, Music, Religious Studies, University of Oregon, 2007

Therapy Models

The main treatment model that I draw from is called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which is a mindfulness-based cognitive-behavioral therapy that has been shown to be highly effective for many different kinds of conditions. When treating OCD, I use Exposure and Response Prevention, which is a "gold standard" first-line treatment. When working with couples, I use Emotionally Focused Therapy, The Gottman Method, and elements of ACT. I attend regular trainings to advance my expertise in my specialties, as well as to maintain professional standards of ethics and cultural competency.

Theories and Philosophies

I draw heavily from several theories and philosophies that inform my understanding of behavior, emotion, and relationships:

• Systems theory teaches that all behavior makes sense in context, and is a powerful framework for understanding relational dynamics, which unlocks the ability for change.

• Attachment theory tells us about our default mode in relationships, which is key to understanding (and therefore changing) emotional and relational dynamics.

• The Gottman Method, developed by John and Julie Gottman, has given us a data-driven breakdown of what makes relationships succeed or fail. I draw from it heavily in assessing relationships, their strengths and their weaknesses.

• Buddhism is a several-thousand-year-old technology focused on understanding and eliminating suffering. Although I am completely secular in my approach to therapy, and absolutely do not incorporate any metaphysical or theological beliefs (and in fact, I'm not even Buddhist), I have studied Buddhism extensively, am an avid meditator, and can't help but be heavily influenced by the sophisticated framework that Buddhism provides to explain the human condition, the psychological basis of suffering, and the pathway to freedom.